Summer Blues

I have been feeling gloomy for awhile because I have not written anything due to the businness of summer vacations and such. I was yearning to write something, but I did not have my computer, which I now regretfully wish I brought.

This summer was filled with expectations and potential for greatness, but so far it just gave me disappointment. There is so much sadness and misfortune, one bad thing after another.

My dog died this past Monday. She did not live that long nor did we really know why she died. I thought my cat Patches was the first to go because of his old age, but that was not the case. She suffered so much in her final days and I was not there to say goodbye. I felt heartbroken for my mom the most. She was the one who truly loved our dog and raised her since she was a puppy.

Currently I have been staying at my boyfriend Anthony’s apartment in Kentucky. We had so much planned out and I was so excited to see what lies next on our upcoming adventures. That also fell apart. He had money saved up for a trip to the lake and other fun things, but the stupid airline that I rode on (by the way never fly with United airlines. Crappy service and rude workers.) never took out the money when we ordered the ticket back in April. They took all of Anthony’s money three days after I landed and when he called about this issue, the woman on the phone disregarded him and treated him with such distastefulness.

Now we both have been watching tv all day long. We don’t really go out to do anything because we both are so broke. I have been couped up in the room all day and all night. I pretty much feel so useless and bored. I enjoy the time I get to spend with Anthony since I only see him once or twice a year, but after awhile you just run out of things to do.

Just last night Anthony had an accident. He slipped into a small pond with a glass in his hand and upon impact with the ground, he clenched the glass and it shattered in his hand. There was so much blood. I have never seen so much come out of someone in person. I was in shock and froze as his friends tried to stop the bleeding. We rushed him to the emergency room and the doctor reported back and said Anthony will need surgery. During the process of numbing and stitching his hand back together, he was in so much pain that three of us had to hold him down. The hospital staff were terrible to him as well. The nurses negelected him and let him dehydrate as he bled out. They did not stitch him up until five hours after we got to the hospital. They were all so negligent and irresponsible to their patients.

I stayed up all night with him, from 1a.m. till the sun came up. It was a difficult night. After we left the hospital, all the adrenaline had worn off, and my anxiety kicked in. I had a mini anxiety attack at the restaurant and sat on the floor, trying to breathe. I felt helpless and weak, I don’t know why, I just felt that way.

Now it is 2a.m. here and I had the strong urge to write and read,to take my mind off of last night’s events. Anthony is sound asleep while I am wide awake, suffering from the summer blues.

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